Stepping Out!

3 months ago:
"No! I will never do it... am so not ready"

1 month ago:
"Okay, but just not now, I will faint on the spot & you know, my skill is just not there yet."

Last Wednesday(26th Oct):
"No no no.... please don't, tell me U are joking...please!"

This dialogue is all about how I reject someone when they asked me to speak in CF. In my heart, wherever someone brought this up, I just wanted to run away & push it aside. Because, I am afraid.

Until last Wednesday, it was God Himself who ask me this time... While doing my quiet time, I heard Him saying, "I want you to share in this coming CF (Stepping Out)". I face so much struggles, because I know, this time is God asking & no way I could run already..
But, I still being stubborn & try to think this is not God, just my own imagination. So i said, "God, if this is what You desire, give me A CONFIRMATION"

True enough, in an hour later, a sms came to me by my leader, the message was suppose to reply to the previous message i sent. The content is encouraging me to be obedient. & while reading it, God is like using every line of the message to tell me "Be Obedient To Me, & Share It"

No way! My whole world actually like drop during the very second i read the sms...is like Gone case! But, Im stubborn enough to say, this is not a direct confirmation, again I put it out of the window.

While sleeping, about 3:20 am, I woke up trembling, i do not know why, i have no peace at all! So i begin to read my Bible & worship, but... i still feel the same. So i begin to question, why is this happening to me? PAP! The nudge comes in again, "Daughter, say Yes to Me".

Okay this time I knew is really from God, and the moment I said, "Yes God, I will do it", the peace immediately fall on me.

Within the whole week, I learn to rely on God, because, I cannot do this at all. If were not God, I will never even put my feet on the stage! But God has been really faithful, & the verse Be Bold & Courageous for wherever you go, I will be there" Joshua 1:9 [This is the verse God given me before I say Yes to taking up CF, that time I do not fully understand why God give me this verse, but now I know]

Fast forward to the Friday, I was nervous like mad, i think, I did not do as what I expected. But God never fail to move in the imperfection! :D Because there were 16 responded to the altar! PRAISE THE LORD!

I have truly experience a breakthrough as this time, God has grant me the courage to not bound by fears, but really to take the step forward! At least in this area, fear has begin to lost it holds on me, because God has slowly leading me out! ^^

-Only God will show us & guide us to a life that contain so much more. With Him, we could do more than what we think ourselves could & to continue to go to the Next Level!-